me and myself..

Assalamualaikum wrt..

i got this sentences from one of my frens.. but really touches me!! she aims those sentences to herself but.. uhuhuhuuhuhhuu..

dah ikut usrah ke hulu ke hilir pun, balik-balik duk sibuk buang masa, gelak ketawa tak ingat dunia, cakap dan tengok dan buat benda lagha bukan sekali-sekala. dah bedah buku muntalaq tapi perangai dah ada sikit-sikit macam da'ie ke? tak berani nak kata. orang macam saya ni ke nak tegakkan Islam? Quran berapa kali sehari saya buka dan baca dan cuba faham? ke berapa hari sekali? pakai pakaian lawa-lawa sebab imej Islam ke sebab memang nak melawa? ilmu dah banyak mana? insaf, insaf konon, pastu esok lusa buat lagi. da'ie? da'ie?? da'ie??? boleh la nak gelakkan diri sendiri. masih bergelumang dengan jahiliyah, nak jadi da'ie. jahiliyah macam chewing gum lekat kat kaki sendiri tak buang-buang lagi. buang karan naqib, naqibah je ada la kalau ilmu yang dicurah tak sampai ke hati.

muliakah hidupku ini?

i know that.. changing is not a very easy thing.. yet i say those words.. say that i wanna change.. but deep inside..i dont know whether i really change or juz me that hiding behind my own words... ppl around me may say that i'm different from b4.. yeah!! *smirk* it's not my place to judge whether i've change.. nor ppl around me..

also i dont wanna being hypocrite.. nor a survival among croc n tiger.. nor juz escapisme(is this a rite spell?)when i look back to wut i've done.. soo many things that i did.. but give a very little effect to the others.. then u may say that.. i've done wut i can.. but do we know wut's our limit? can we see the limit like we see our exam result? this is not an exam like our univ give us..

*hati tgh sakit skrg.. so xleh tulih lebih2.. kang ade korg dgr salah sorg kwn korg dimasukkan ke hospital sakit jiwe lak.. ehehehhehehe c ya.. wassalam