kiri kanan

kiri kanan
sering berteman
riang gelak berkala
memecah sunyi
yang cuba menyelit

alangkah indahnya kita
kiri kanan
sering berteman
lupa pada merahnya mata
semalam
lupa pada dendam membuku
kelmarin

sedarkah kita
betapa bertuahnya kita
sedarkah kita
betapa huduhnya dunia di luar
sedarkah kita
bahawa kite sedang
dipagarkan dengan angan-angan

tapi kadang kala
mimpi itu perlu
angan-angan itu perlu
hargailah dunia kita
hargailah laman kita
sedang ia masih dipagar
sedang ia masih cantik terhias

kerna
kiri kanan kita
sebenarnya runtuh
dimamah usia
ditelan duniawi
dikunyah material
ditenyeh oleh daging busuk
bernama hati.

*notakaki: ilham puisi ini dari anys pongpongurl >:)

almost

salam.

hari sabtu. selama 2 minggu tertunggu2 hari yg bertarikh 25/07/09 ni. hehe.
my fren from college got married on that day. ops. no. i mean the day before. and the 'walimah' is on the saturday.
waaa. quite gempak. erm she is the daughter of Zubir Ali, a composer. (normally tradisional songs) hihi. and i met a few frens that i haven't see for more than 4 years, i think.
so, i was quite excited at that time. the pics are in my phone so i'll upload them later. cuaca hari tu agak panas. dan nak dijadikan cerita, i got lost on the back. haha oh, the ceremony was at kolej kediaman syed zahiruddin (UM) seksyen 16, i drove there safely because i studied the map more than 10 times haha. on the back, mesti lah xstudi jalan balik. last2, masuk KL and kluar balik ikut phileo damansara. cess.

reached home at about 7pm. really2 tired but satisfied. got headache but still conscious. haha. they insisted on a 'lepak2 at mamak somehwere' but i dont like night driving haha. nasib baik reached home b4 getting dark.

sampai rumah. basuh baju. and about 10pm felt really sleepy. so tutup lampu and prepared utk tido. erk rase something wrong. huhu nape plak ni. baring-baring guling-guling for about almost one hour. bgn bukak lampu balik. huhu browsed tenet... tuuttt.. ngantok.
tido. pukul 2am. terbgn. tak boleh tido. huhu kenape ni? sakit tekak. alamak. terigt td sgt panas. alamak~!
minum air. hampir satu botol besar. then tido balik. then terjaga pukul 530am. sgt terkejut. huhu minum air then solat subuh. tak boleh tido. huhu
minum air lagi. no food no orange at the moment. nk mkn ubat. dont like.
basuh baju then jemur. then minum air. kemas bilik then minum air. g toilet. then minum air. sgt xnk demam waktu skrg. seksa.
skrg kol 6pm.
alamak! plan nk g jogging. huhu xjd la. now i feel a bit better. but lenguh satu bdn sbb kemas bilek plus basuh baju td. bloated stomach so ulang alik g toilet haha. hrp2 tak demam. :P
almost~! nasib baik i know my body but not that well. at least kalau nk demam, i know what to do and what shouldnt do. hehe
adios~!

Bukan superman - the lucky laki

salam

Anak sapa la ni.



hehe ^_^

It's not goodbye~!

salam~!

a few days ago, i browsed around romantic/love songs (haha it's just i'm in that kind of mood). then, i found a korean vclip with an english song. the song is somehow quite attached to me, erk, no.. i feel attached toward the song. *blush*

@@@

title: it's not goodbye

artist: laura pausini

And what if I never kiss your lips again
Or feel the touch of your sweet embrace
How would I ever go on
Without you there's no place to belong

Well someday love is gonna lead you back to me
But 'til it does I'll have an empty heart
So I'll just have to believe
Somewhere out there you thinking of me


CHORUS:
Until the day I'll let you go
Until we say our next hello
It's not goodbye
'Til I see you again
I'll be right here rememberin' when
And if time is on our side
There will be no tears to cry
On down the road
There is one thing I can't deny
It's not goodbye

You'd think I'd be strong enough to make it through
And rise above when the rain falls down
But it's so hard to be strong
When you've been missin' somebody so long

It's just a matter of time I'm sure
But time takes time and I can't hold on
So won't you try as hard as you can
To put my broken heart together again

CHORUS

@@@

just feel like sharing something. :P

nak dengar?

streaming

download: aimini, 4shared.

then, 2day i have this urge to watch the vclip, i mean the original vclip. it's quite old, i think. then, i found a video that used the song as the background song. well, it's actually a movie. erm, i never heard or watch this movie, so i put it in to-be-dload list of movies. haha. the title is sweet november.

the actor is keanu reeves!!! the movie goes one step higher in term of priority. but, sad ending.

nah, it's ok.

ok daa~!

1 tahun sudaa~!

salam.

tepuk pengakap~! pap! pap! .. pap! pap! pap! pap!~!

hehe..

yesterday, d anniversary sethn keje n sethn kat pf. alhamdulillah.

komen? hmm..

alhamdulillah.

..

tu je?

hmm..

setelah sethn dalam alam keje nih. mcm2 diambil sbg pengajaran. :D yela yg elok ambil sbg pengajaran. n yg tak elok tu jadikan sempadan.

i have frens who just graduate from univ. they all say about missing 'zaman studi'. i can only laugh. well, sooner or later u'll realize that thats not the real world. well, i cant say that i dont miss 'zaman studi' but at some point, i have my own targets. i want to achieve something and those targets cant be achieved while i'm in 'studi age' (haha mentang2 la baru tgk ice age).

i'm really thankful to Allah, coz i'm still in His mercy. n also to PF (rogue) coz believes in me haha.

huraayyy~!

...@@\-

.@@@| \!/~~

.@@@| /!\~~

...@@/ -

arigatou~! shinjite kureru..

\(^_^)/

salam.

indeed, i really love my frens.

\(^_^)/

i'm really an idiot. crying alone. despise the world. didn't realize that i have this many frens that care for me.

thank you (^x^) hugs n kisses for u guys.

i was depressed last few days and miraclely (i will call this, a miracle =D ) after read few comments left for me, i laughed with all my heart. yes, a miracle. i think, privating this blog is a really bad idea. i should know that i have my frens supporting me. i just didn't see them. because they are always there for me.

whoossshhhh~! (bunyik buang semua bad bad sad worry morry things)

slluuurrrppppp~! (bunyik sedut heppi merri gooo lakiii thingiii)

*

hehe.

n for the purpose of this entry.

**

ehem. ehem.

thank you so much for believing in me, when i myself can't face the world. i will never forget this moment, when there are people always take care for me. whenever i feel i'm at the bottom of hell (just analogy), i'll remember this moment.

i know word 'thanks' will never get to the same level as what u guys did to me, but i will do the same if u guys need someone. (except for anynomous, i don't know who u are, so if u need someone, juz let me know.. V(^_^).. )

tenkiu~! hugz n kisses~! fuuuu... fuuu... fuuuu..~! (bunyik flying hugz n kisses g kat sume org. hehe)

tensen.................................... grrrr

salam.

utk mengelakkan segale jenis perkataan tidak elok terkeluar dari mulut lembik ni.

nah~!

sakit peyot~!

salam.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
sakit peyot
.
.
.
.
.
.
i bite my lips
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
sori aku ngah gelong
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
sakit peyot
.
.
.
.
.
.
..........tuuuuttttt.......

this small world

salam.

.
..
...

toleh kanan. bantal :|

toleh kiri. radio.

kat depan ada laptop.

blakang. tingkap terbuka luas.

...
..
.

mane satu aku nk pilih?
semua aku xnk. eh bukan. semua aku nak.
aku toleh kanan. xde org.
aku toleh kiri. xde org.
kat depan aku pon xde org.
blakang?

adakah tak patut aku membelakangi org?

"ko idop di antara orang. xnk kwn ngan org, g idop sorg2 kat pulau la. thats better for ppl like u, who cant live around ppl."

*i bite my lips*

bkn sng nk carik teman idop.
toleh kanan. xde org.
toleh kiri. xde org.
aku yg kunci pintu bilik sndr.
xleh nk salahkan org.

i guess, there's nothing for me. T_T

suddenly, it strikes me.

salam.

venue: opis

time: 430+pm

pc: pc opis >:) bkn malas tp (quote tajuk)

something happened. a few days ago. kesannye aku rasa hina sgt. rasa aku ni tak layak berkawan dengan orang-orang yang mementingkan kawan. aku ni bagaikan tergolong di kalangan orang yang melupakan kawan, tidak setia dan apa ntah lagi. *whatever*

satu benda yang aku tak boleh terima. ludah dan jilat balik. it's not only about maruah. termasuklah stand aku terhadap kekawan lain. if i were to hate someone, i even don't want to see that person, don't want to be in his/her present. coz i will feel pain. and i'm not gud in poker. so everything will show thru my face. and atmost i don't wanna hurt him/her by doing so. if i feel the pain and they also feel the pain. whats the point of being hypocrite?

aku nih pendendam sgt ke? someone said to me that its not gud. dendam terindah adalah kemaafan. well, u go on with it. i've been stabbed from behind by i-thought-they-are-my friends and the incident was a year ago, and i still can't forgive them. i still can't talk like normal to them. it's not that i hate them. but i'm surrounded by the pain. and here we go, a hypocrite person who pretends that everything is allright. dendam la kot. but this is not what i want. i want to be fren with all. i want to get along with everyone. i love my frens. tapi orang tua-tua cipta peribahasa "pisang berbuah 2 kali" bukan untuk saja2.

maybe i've been protecting myself from all the pain. but it shows that how big their existance in my life.

*sigh*

i'm trying hard to sort out my feelings. if u found out that i can't move forward. pls forgive me. i have my own reasons. n this is me. T_T

it's not enough

i barely reach there

to this small town

it is not a modern town

it is not a lively town

it is a beautiful town

with friendly people

i feel great

i want to live here

i feel appreciated

i'm happy to be here

i feel beloved

i'm sure this is my place

but sometimes

there's flood

there's hunger

there's disease

there's unwanted guest

we just cant help it

we cant control the world

we were taught about accepting

we learned about forgiving

we knew about misunderstanding

but we forgot all that

at the moment of anger

at the moment of despair

the street at this town

seems lonely

full with tears

swallowed up by darkness

can it return to how it was?

can it be the place of joy?

i'm not a good person

i'm learning to be one

but i dont want to be hypocrite

i'm learning not to be one

so if i cant be nice

dont expect me to be nice

if i cant forgive you

dont expect a 'sorry' from me

i'm hurt..

brokenheart~!

salam.

i really really going to write a pessimis entry. so dont sneer or dont critic me for being a -ve person. one day i know i'm gonna end up being a lonely person. not because i want to. but i still havnt found anyone who is truely care about me. i'm sorry if the ppl around me is actually really care about me. but this is what i feel. i dont want to b a hypocrite person, i dont want to lie and i know that i'm not a fun person to b with. but i really feel thankful toward ppl around me. what they've done, are not at the same level as words 'thank you'.

2 depressing things happened to me 2day. make me think that i'm a nobody. maybe in a wrong place, i dont know. the first one is, someone put my name and my blog (this blog) in an entry and bullshit me. T_T i've never 'kutuk' any of my frens. even the worst thing, i just say i disapointed in them. i've never talk -ve thing bout them. at last, i will say i wont care about them.

i know i'm not a good person, not a good fren. thats y i treat ppl better than myself. then, what did i get from them? T_T when i read about her entry, i bite my lips all day today so that i will not cry. try it! it works. haha sorry! blame it to my messed-up head.

i'm not good at poker game. i cant act as nothing in front of someone who i feel really hurt because of that person. my eyes will run away from his/her face. my mouth wont open. my smile will feel bitter. my tears is free at such time. i'll bite my lips.

this life is not a game. this life is harder than a game. and it doesnt have level. but most of all, we only have one life. i dont want to b serious but i dont want to take it easy.

the second thing is, i feel like i'm being played. my salary was reduced. rm200 deducted from the original amount for 3 months. but my boss said to me that my salary will be as usual. he said it last month. last month i still got the deducted amount and also this month. i thought i heard it wrong, n thought that it will as usual this month. but i still got the less salary. i feel depressed. my parents said it's time to change my tires (my car's) and that would b around rm130+ and there's something wrong with brakes, so i decided i have to change the brake tube. and that would b around rm120. then, the battery prob. arghhhhhh~!

*i bite my lips again*

come on~! life could be harder than this. if i cant get through this, i wont become stronger.

so, whats a prob to someone, is not a prob to others. and whats prob to others is not a prob to someone else.

my obsession. >:)

salam.

ehem. ehem. ehem.

to those that dislike/despise or really hate anime. u can stop reading this time entry. haha.

de stori is like dis. :P

i just found 'one piece' fanclub in facebook. and fiy i really really really love one piece. and in one of the topics is about the quote that u really like in the series.

so i want to post here those quotes.

>:)

\(^_^)/

"you can whip food or sake at me or even spit on me, i can just laugh it off
BUT! I DON"T CARE WHAT REASON YOU HAVE, I WON'T FORGIVE ANYONE WHO MESS WITH MY FRIEND"

-shanks

\(^_^)/

"everyone has something he can and he cannot do....I'll do whatever you cannot do, n' you do whatever I can't do..."
Sanji to ussop in Enies Lobby

\(^_^)/

" Miracle can only descend upon those with the will to carry on"

-Ivankof to Bon clay

\(^_^)/

When do you think people die?

When they are shot through the heart by the bullet of a pistol?

No.

When they are ravaged by an incurable disease?

No.

When they drink a soup made of a poisonous mushroom!?

No!

It’s when…they are forgotten.

Even after I’m gone, my dream will come true.

The ailing hearts of the people will be cured.

-Dr. Hiluluk

\(^_^)/

"Justice change its shape and direction depends on who hold it."

-Aokiji

\(^_^)/

"If you don't risk yourlife, you can't create a future."

"No One Decides Your Fate, You Decide It For Yourself!"

-Luffy

\(^_^)/

"if i can't even protect my captain's dream, then what ever ambition i have is nothing but just talk"

-zoro to kuma

when i think back. sometimes those words really kept me going. haha. one thing, maybe u think ppl who watch things like this (some of u called them craps) u thout we will get nothing out of them. yup, i agree only when u close one eye and shut one ear. well, some maybe say i just want to justify what i like. but it's up to u. =D

just jgn pndg rendah pd org lain. anyone. it could be ur downfall starting point.

live our life to the fullest, bcoz we dont have second chance \(^_^)/

mata ne~!